Listening from behind the indecisive curtains
An inclination for the top
Whoever took on the top job at regeneration quango English Partnerships was always going to have a bit of a mountain to climb. But David Higgins, who took over as chief executive last month, is to make this challenge literal.

He has somehow been persuaded that it would be the "best possible thing" for him to participate in a charity event that involved climbing the highest peaks of England, Wales and Scotland. Higgins – a keen hill-walker – was initially eager, but rumours have surfaced of "unavoidable" meetings of senior management being called at short notice over the next few months. It seems Higgins has a talent for turning a mountain into a molehill.

Draw your own conclusions
Goldcrest Homes has ensured that residents of its new "Angelis" apartments need never feel at risk again. Muggings and gun crime may be things of the past as residents will find little need ever to leave home.

The apartments, ready in July 2004 for chief execs with a penny or two to spare, feature an in-house cinema, gym and outdoor t'ai chi terrace, not to mention the Cardio Home Automation security system which electronically opens your curtains in the morning, boils the kettle and controls the lighting through a programmed key-pad.

Affordable housing? Perhaps not, and no plans yet for a social housing version. But burglars beware: the flats breathe on even when residents are away, maintaining the owner's routine of lights on, lights off, music on and off – and the all-important "indecisive curtains". Best not to ask.

A clean sweep?
Obviously inspired by the time of year, Coventry transfer landlord Whitefriars Housing Group has decided it is appropriate for tenants to "spring into action". Unfortunately, the initiative is not some cunning plan on the part of senior management to get tenants to contribute to meeting the decent homes standard by cleaning their properties from top to bottom. It refers to an event – held last weekend – at which residents could learn more about their landlord.

It involved art and dance workshops and a Big Brother-style video diary room where tenants were able to air their views. Peter Lacy, chair of Whitefriars Services, says he will listen to everything he hears and shape services accordingly – just so long as they don't vote to evict him.

Nice day at the orifice
Which is worse – to be kept awake by noise or noxious odours? Facing just such a choice in a recent case, the Housing Ombudsman ordered Trafford council to provide 24-hour ventilation in a tower block, despite pleas that the racket it made would be unbearable. Irate residents are now, apparently, frantically swapping clothes pegs for ear-plugs.

Needlessly needled

The definition of antisocial behaviour widened further last week when a Housing Today staffer met a group of friends (including someone not unconnected with the Audit Commission) for cocktails at London’s Savoy Hotel. They had enjoyed only a tipple or two before a waiter informed them that their presence would no longer be tolerated unless they ceased the terribly antisocial practice of … knitting. Other drinkers sprang to the ladies’ defence but to no avail. Knitting should only be done in one’s own home, the waiter maintained. Should he ever tire of waiting tables, perhaps there is a role for him in a hard-nosed anti-nuisance team?

Source

Housing Today