Call waiting

Tavares is standing in the charity's call centre – a small room with just enough space for four people. On the wall, a large whiteboard lists all Refuge's shelters and whether or not they are full.

"This centre is a lifeline for women in abusive relationships," Tavares says as a worker takes another call from a woman in distress. "This helpline is about reducing domestic violence in society and it's vital for women to know that we are here for them."

There are four lines available to callers from 9am to 5pm and four staff who answer them. From 5pm to 9 am, two lines are open.

The centre works on a rota system, so two members of staff come in at 9 am and another two at 10am. During this time, a ring-round of all the refuges is done to find out what spaces are available and what services they offer; for example, some places can only take children up to a certain age. At 2pm, two more workers come in and take over the phones to give the others a break. This shift change is vital to morale, Tavares says, as the job is very emotionally draining.

This year, 11,558 calls were attempted to the helpine; 2489 calls were answered. Of the 9066 calls not answered, 8862 callers got through to the answerphone, 102 got the engaged tone, and 102 heard the phone ringing but their call was not answered so the

The centre receives a wide variety of calls. Whereas one person may be emotionally charged and upset, another may be calm and collected. Whatever the mental state of the caller, workers make sure she is calling from somewhere safe, like a cafe, a neighbour's house or a payphone.

Helpline staff are often asked questions about housing rights, says Tavares. "Generally women are worried about how leaving the family home will affect their accommodation rights, especially if they hold a dual tenancy. They also want to know about practical things like what they can do with their furniture and what things they can take to the refuge with them and what the refuge is like." People also want to know where they will be rehoused: will it be hard to get housing association or council accommodation, how far away will the family have to move, will there be schools nearby?

Staff also have to deal with the variety of personalities who call: conversely to the stereotype of the battered, introverted housewife, many callers are in fact businesswomen and professionals – confident in all other aspects of their lives but unable to stand up to the violence to which their partners subject them. And helpline workers must be able to call on all their interpersonal skills and knowledge under great pressure: the phones can ring non-stop during the peak periods of the late morning and afternoon – when children are at school and partners are at work.

A frequent difficulty that Refuge workers face when they are placing women in hostels ia accommodating women with older children. Tavares explains: "You can get a 12-year-old boy who looks quite mature but has behavioural problems because of the violence he has seen, and he may be in the habit of repeating that violence. Some refuges are simply not equipped to deal with these children so you can't send the family there."

only 22% of calls can currently be answered

Christmas is always busy on the helpline as it is a difficult time for women caught up in abusive relationships – especially if they have children. Some feel that now is the time to make the break before the stress and chaos of the festive season give their partners the excuse to become even more violent, while others feel that they can move on once festive celebrations and the pressure for families to be together are out the way.

However, not all the women who call necessarily want to leave their homes straight away. Some just want to talk, while others may be thinking about leaving and want to know what rights they have.

Whatever they decide, one of the guiding principles for all helpline workers is that they must never tell the woman what to do, because this could put her in danger. Tavares says: "It can be difficult but you have to keep a professional boundary. If we push our beliefs onto the women then we could jeopardise their safety even more. If she wants to leave then we have to plan it properly, otherwise we will just put her in a vulnerable position and she could well end up going back to an abusive home. If her immediate safety is about suggesting that she wear three or four jumpers so that she has some padding to protect her from the blows, then that's what we do."

In the three years that Tavares has been at the helpline, she has seen domestic violence given a higher profile, largely as a result of soap operas such as Eastenders, which focused heavily on the issue. Last week the Office of the Deputy Prime Minister pledged £9m towards helping domestic violence victims, and last Sunday the new role of head of the Home Office's domestic violence unit was advertised – the successful candidate will start early next year.