Where to be seen
Only the social side of the conference makes all those speeches and boiler manufacturers tolerable. The classiest do is generally considered to be developer St George's dinner in the State Room at local pile Harewood House. A black tie event, the return of its attendees to the bar at the Majestic Hotel, where the conference is based, is always guaranteed to be quite a sight.
Other organisations try to be a little bit different. Architect Levitt Bernstein's dinner amid the ruins of Fountains Abbey can, on a balmy summer's evening, be as beautiful as a table of architects can be.
Glitzy conferences on the Mediterranean can boast yacht-board parties, something sadly denied to landlocked Northern towns. But that doesn't deter some hosts, who throw their bashes on narrowboats. Although not exactly on the high seas, such a venue is not without its dangers. A couple of years ago, two members of a party from a London council decided to pop ashore while the boat was moored to have a fag. Sadly, their absence was not noticed and the boat returned to Harrogate without them.
Whoops, there go my trousers
Some events are strictly black-tie but others are a bit more "come as you are" – or, in one instance, "come as you were". A few years ago, building contractor William Davis hosted a fancy-dress party with a 1960s theme. However, the room in which it was held was double-booked, and halfway through the swinging retro shindig, a gaggle of Housing Corporation staff wandered in, expecting something completely different.
It says a lot about the impressive consistency of the corporation's dress code that not all the new arrivals realised they had come into the wrong event.
Housing minister Lord Falconer has also found himself caught satorially short at the conference. In 2001 he arrived expecting to make only a short appearance, like most ministers. However, he found himself having such a good time that he decided to stay, putting CIH bods anxious to please their star turn in something of a pickle. Gallantly, former director of policy John Perry gave up his room to the peer – to find himself sharing, rumour has it, with CIH chief executive Dave Butler – while chief conference organiser Maggie Punyer rushed around Harrogate buying undies and shirts for the minister.
There are many rumours about CIH Scotland boss Alan Ferguson, including trouser-compromising dance floor antics.
But his frequent attempts to brighten up proceedings surely peaked the morning he awoke after a particularly energetic evening to find he was still plastered – with make-up. The origins of this anecdote have been lost in the intervening years, but the gauntlet has been thrown down – can he better it in 2003?
You can tell the Northern councillors straight away. They’re always with their wives. And you can tell the Southern councillors because you’re never sure it’s their wife who’s on their arm
Harrogate regular
Confessions of a conference-goer
Some Harrogate regulars prefer to eschew clothes altogether. For a couple of years, Charmaine Young, now director of regeneration at St George but then at housebuilder Lovell, used to hold get-togethers for 20 women in housing at the Turkish baths on a Thursday afternoon. Apparently, the ladies would strip to no more than their smiles and plunge into the pool – but with the baths closed for refurbishment this year, that seems out of the question.
On another occasion, a certain developer sparked accusations of sexism by inviting dancing girls to its reception. The next year, in a valiant but perhaps ill-thought-out strike for equal opportunities, it brought out the dancing boys instead.
Then, of course, there are the shenanigans that go on away from the public's vulgar gaze. At least, the participants might want it that way – but not all get away with it. "You can tell the Northern councillors straight away," says one source. "They're always with their wives. And you can tell the Southern councillors because you're never sure it's their wife who's hanging on to their arm."
One breathless insider claims to have seen, one year, the then-director of housing for a London council propping up the bar in the Crown at lunchtime with his hands all over the chair of his committee, and then again in the evening – except this time it was the Majestic bar and the vice-chair of housing in another London borough.
The dissenters
Of course, there are always party poopers. One senior housing professional from Manchester won't be attending this year. "It's dismal, dreadful and full of drunks," he sneers. "It's a boorish junket and a waste of time," says another.
One weary worker was unable to attend one year because of a prior engagement at a tenant conference. No matter, he says: "I reckoned the debate was at a higher level where I was."
All the fun of the fair
Of course, since you're in Harrogate and the CIH has gone to all the trouble of putting on a conference for you, you might as well take a stroll around the exhibition hall. However, there comes a time when small sample cross-sections of double glazing and models of sheltered schemes in Prestatyn begin to bore even the most enthusiastic of housing professionals. Not, however, those who have children, who can be easily identified by their habit of dashing around the hall on Thursday hoovering up as many pencil tops and novelty stress toys as they can carry home to the kids.
And you never know, you might strike it lucky. One source fondly remembers, eight years later, what possibly amounts to the perfect exhibition stall, set up by consultant PricewaterhouseCoopers. It consisted of one rep, one Scalextric track and one hell of a load of gin and tonic. Bliss.
Source
Housing Today
No comments yet