George Tzilivakis says we can’t tackle neighbour disputes if we are freaked out by other people’s emotions (17 September, page 33).

So true. It has been said that 90% of behaviour problems come from people’s unmet need to be listened to. One study reported that the number one request from suicidal teenagers was for adults to listen to them. The medical/therapeutic power of listening has also been proven by many studies. Clearly, we all feel better, when we are heard properly. In addition, we feel better when we are understood. In order to be understood, we must be listened to.

Often it is more important for us to feel heard than it is to actually get what we say we want. On the other hand, feeling ignored and misunderstood is literally painful whether we are six or 60.

Mole Chapman, via the Housing Today website

Source

Housing Today