Surely this should have read ''It then occurred to me that getting it on The Archers would be the best way to get people talking about me."
I first became interested in the possibilities of free publicity when one of my children asked about it during a car journey. After some research, I discovered that it was easier to get column inches in an award-winning magazine by writing a regular column than, say, delivering £5.6m of profit and meeting market expectations, much as my own company had recently done (relegated to page 17 on the edition of 12 March).
I then wondered who could have leaked this information to the press. Could it be somebody from the Whitbybird organisation, or are we looking at another government mole? Leeks, moles … wait, I have an idea …
Dear Ms Camilla Fisher,
I wondered if your friends at Eastenders would like a new story line (not to be released for two years ) about a resurrected Arthur Fowler having problems with moles eating the leeks on his allotment …
Could you also please withhold my name and company as I wouldn't like to be accused of trying to obtain free publicity.