“Do you watch Little Britain?” Adrian demands as I sit down. “Who does he look like? Go on, guess!”

He waggles a finger in the general direction of his boss, Andy Black, who rolls his eyes as the group giggle.

“You know the scene with the prime minister, and his über camp assistant?” The others smirk. “He looks more like his other twin though,” Steph giggles. Who? “Have you ever seen Ready Steady Cook?” Er, no I confess. “Ainsley Harriott?” she suggests. Andy grins. “It’s the smile,” she continues. The others nod sagely. As implausible as their chosen lookalikes are, they’ve clearly had this conversation before. In depth.

The boss shrugs and takes a sip of his drink – champagne bought specially to celebrate Steph’s good news. “I’ve been made a British citizen” she shrieks excitedly in a Canadian accent.

“About time you started living here legally,” sniggers Paul.

Steph ignores him and continues: “I’ve been chosen by Boris Johnson specially.” Sorry, what? Since when has the Blonde One had the power to decide who should be British?

“She wasn’t exactly chosen,” Jamie explains. “They rung her up this morning to say she had been randomly selected to have the London mayor present her with her citizenship at City Hall.”

Steph, unfazed by the truth, is rehearsing God Save The Queen in the mistaken belief that she will be required to do a solo for Boris. “I’ve been practicing today,” she announces proudly.

“I know,” says Paul. “We could hear you in the boardroom.”

Steph cringes. “I went through this phase where I would get really drunk, and just start singing your national anthem,” she continues.

In fact, it seems Steph has a penchant for all things British. She excitedly tells the rest of the team about the time that the Queen tried to run her over. “I was running in Windsor and I had to jump on the grassy verge,” she says. “Queen Liz came right up close in the Jag she was driving, and gave me a wink.” Jamie and Paul splutter into their pints.

“Are you sure she didn’t have something in her eye?” I tentatively suggest. “Well she might not have actually been winking at me,” Steph admits, grudgingly. “But she may as well have been,” she adds, beaming. I’m not quite sure Boris knows what he’s let himself in for.

Conversation returns back to lookalikes and Ainsley Harriott, until Adrian suddenly recalls tomorrow is pay review day. “Please forget all we’ve said tonight Andy,” he begs his boss.

Andy turns to me. “Have you seen the X Factor?” he asks, nodding in the direction of the other Paul who has a shock of blonde hair to rival Boris. “Do you remember a guy called Rhydian …”

Where, what was drunk?

Venue: The Pitcher and Piano, Mayfair
Tucked away drinking hole, good for post-work bevvies
Subjects: Lookalikes, British citizenship, the national anthem
Drinks drunk: Champagne, Guinness, G&T, Fosters

Who was there

Andrew Black chief executive
Richard Munro account manager
Paul Scott head of sales
Ian Brown senior contracts manager
Adrian Reilly business development director
Jamie Gold business development director
Stephanie Fox business development director
Paul Weaver operations director
Andy Locke sales director
Sophie Griffiths Building